I feel like I haven't posted in forever. All four of you who check in here to see what is going on in my life must be completely devastated.
I haven't been feeling too hot so I have stayed home from work the past two days. I feel kinda bad about ditching the people there, but I have loved being home with my baby and getting some stuff done around the house.
Have I ever mentioned that pets and I just don't mix? I seriously have no intention of owning a pet in my life, much to the chagrin of my cat and dog loving husband. But right now we are at the in-laws and I simply don't get a say about these kinds of things. So we have been living with a feral cat named Max for over a year now. His hair gets everywhere and he likes to puke every now and again, but mostly he stays out of the way.
This past weekend, my mother-in-law took my sister-in-law, her kids and my little cutie boy to Salinas with her to get some stuff done around the house she inherited from her mom there. Her mom's two cats haven't had anyone to take care of them since the latest tenant moved out. My sweet MIL loves cats and feels responsible for these two. So they came home with her. Now we live with three cats -- three cats who don't get along with each other. Max and Miss Kitty were having a showdown in the hallway outside our bedroom the other night and the sudden squeals, hisses and growls that accompanied this face-off nearly scared me to death. Miss Kitty seems to think she rules this place. She goes wherever she wants -- the kitchen counter, my baby's crib, etc. She also likes to hang out on the bathmat in front of the sink. Gosh, I love peeing in front of felines. My tactic for dealing with these creatures is to view them as incentives to move out rather than major pains in my kiester.
So everyone hates me now, right, because I detest living with animals? I like animals. I just don't like living with them.
I went shopping this weekend to buy a couple of pairs of pants for work. I wasn't going to get much. Then I found a bunch of awesome items on clearance for $6, earrings that were buy one get one free, and shoes that were half off. Um, I went crazy. I was afraid my husband would freak out when he saw how much I was spending. And then I remembered who I was married to. He wasn't in the least bit concerned that I was spending way more on clothes than I should have. The fact that neither one of us is disciplined with money explains a lot about our current situation. We're working on it.
My son is going to Disneyland this weekend with his "real" dad and his dad's family for his grandma's 50th birthday. Can I tell you I am so jealous? It's painful how jealous I am. And slightly sad.
My MIL is in love with the new Pride and Prejudice movie, which is out on DVD today. She went out early this morning to pick up a copy. Isn't that cute?
The other day I was trying to tell Kelly about how my husband and I met and I realized that our story is hard to tell and convoluted. After several minutes of rambling my brain was screaming, "Shut up! Shut up now!", but my mouth and my brain have been at war since my early youth and my mouth continues to be the stronger warrior of the two. Kelly finally escaped by ducking into primary to pick up her son. Lucky girl. I wish I could get away from my ramblings that easily.
I want to add a blogroll to my site. I have no idea how to do this. Maybe one day I will spend the time searching the help section of blogger so I can figure it out.
I spent two hours playing this the other night. If my little peanut hadn't woken up I probably would have played even longer. I need help. I even played a two player game against myself. Would you classify my addiction to this game as a serious addiction? Are you scheduling an intervention as we speak?
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Another Reason It's A Happy Day
In addition to getting a new job, I also got this in the mail. Woo hoo!!! I'm going to have my own version of American Idol at my house every night now -- with me as the only star.
I Have A New Job
An amazing thing happened today -- I got the job I wanted.
I haven't posted much about my current situation before so I'll just lay it all out before you now -- I live with my in-laws. It's not a good thing. They are wonderful people and just about as easy to live with as you could possibly want, but I am nearly thirty years old, married, and the mother of two. I need my own place. My husband and I, however, have had some trouble supporting ourselves fully since we moved out here at the end of 2004. I needed a job immediately upon arrival because we had almost no savings and plenty of bills. I found a job at a great place, with great people and great benefits, but the pay was several thousand dollars less a year than I thought I would be able to make. But I took the job because I really needed it, my family really needed it, and because I felt certain that my husband's art career would soon take off and I could then stay home with my babies like I really want to.
14 months later, reality has set in. Josh is working hard at getting his big break, but it just hasn't come yet and it could be years before it does. I now have to provide for four people, not three. My job is often boring and I am going nowhere fast. It's a small company, they are not inclined to give me any kind of significant raise and there is no way for me to move up to another position any time soon. And every day I feel more and more like the world's biggest loser for not being able to house my own family.
So the job search began in earnest. I heard back from several companies right away and starting going on interviews. I was supposed to hear back from the first company on the 13th with either an offer or a rejection. The night before I was a mess. I was going on and on and on to my hubby about the pros and cons of taking the job if they offered it to me. I was completely unsettled and had no idea whether I should accept it or not. I had a feeling I would be offered the job and just could not get a sense of what my answer should be. Josh was worried about me and so offered to give me a priesthood blessing (this is when a priesthood holder lays their hands on someone's head and gives them the blessings/information the Lord wants them to have relating to their current situation). I resisted at first. I told Josh that I didn't think God cared what job I had as long as I wasn't doing anything illegal or immoral. I don't know why I was so stuck on thinking that since I feel pretty strongly that jobs I have had in the past were essential for me to have, but perhaps I was a little afraid that God did care and that I wouldn't be able to figure out what He wanted me to do. After some more gentle prodding by my sweetie, I had him give me a blessing.
Now, I am not going to go into too much detail here about what I was told in the blessing. It doesn't seem appropriate. However, I will say that I felt much calmer after it was done and was assured that the Lord cared very much about this concern I was having. I also felt I needed to weigh my options out further before making a decision.
Last Tuesday, I was offered a job. The offer was for $5000 more a year than I am currently making, but insurance would have cost me $200 more a month than it currently does. My initial inclination was to accept, but I asked for some time to think it over. They sent me some paperwork and as I looked it over I started to have a bad feeling. Within a few short minutes I went from being almost sure I would take the job to knowing I would not take it. I felt that the bad feelings I was having were the answer to my prayer -- my answer should be no. So I turned down the job.
I went on two more interviews after that. Both went well, but I was really excited about the first. I liked the people and the feeling in the office. The company is much larger than the one I am currently with, therefore there are more opportunities for advancement. I really started hoping I would get the job. They told me they would be making their decision immediately after the holiday weekend and they would get back to me early this week. I expected to hear from them yesterday. I waited and I waited and I waited for a phone call, but none ever came. I started to feel depressed. Surely I would have heard from them if they wanted to hire me. "No news is good news," my friend assured me. I tried to believe her.
The hours rushed by today at work, but still every time I had a chance to catch my breath, I would wonder about this job, about why I hadn't heard from them. By mid-afternoon, I was feeling depressed again. I had to do something about it. I had to figure out what was going on. So I e-mailed the woman I interviewed with and asked if they had made a decision and if not when they were expecting to make one (this was unusually aggressive behavior on my part). She e-mailed me back and said they had not made a decision yet because of some internal issues but that she would get back to me by the end of the week. So I decided I would have to wait another day or two to find out my fate.
At 4:30 the phone rang. It was Josh with a message to call my interviewer at this company. He said he couldn't tell if she sounded happy or not. I called her and braced myself for the worst. She said:
"I would love for you to come work with us!"
The offer is for $6000 more a year than I am currently making. And the benefits are excellent -- better even than my current ones, which are really quite good.
For the past few years, I have just felt like I am not capable of knowing what the Lord wants me to do. I am not in tune, I cannot get inspiration.
But I did. I got inspiration. I knew that I shouldn't take that first job. Even though I didn't know what else was out there for me, I turned it down. And then something much better came along, something that I think will really make a difference for my family, something that will bring us a huge step closer to being on our own.
I am so grateful that He cares for me, that He cares for my family, that He knows our needs and our wants and helps us to achieve them, in His time, in His way. And I am grateful that my husband is a worthy priesthood holder. The blessing that I received under his hands made a big difference to me. And I am starting to feel once again that I am not such a bad person as to be unable to decipher God's communication. And that is a good feeling.
I haven't posted much about my current situation before so I'll just lay it all out before you now -- I live with my in-laws. It's not a good thing. They are wonderful people and just about as easy to live with as you could possibly want, but I am nearly thirty years old, married, and the mother of two. I need my own place. My husband and I, however, have had some trouble supporting ourselves fully since we moved out here at the end of 2004. I needed a job immediately upon arrival because we had almost no savings and plenty of bills. I found a job at a great place, with great people and great benefits, but the pay was several thousand dollars less a year than I thought I would be able to make. But I took the job because I really needed it, my family really needed it, and because I felt certain that my husband's art career would soon take off and I could then stay home with my babies like I really want to.
14 months later, reality has set in. Josh is working hard at getting his big break, but it just hasn't come yet and it could be years before it does. I now have to provide for four people, not three. My job is often boring and I am going nowhere fast. It's a small company, they are not inclined to give me any kind of significant raise and there is no way for me to move up to another position any time soon. And every day I feel more and more like the world's biggest loser for not being able to house my own family.
So the job search began in earnest. I heard back from several companies right away and starting going on interviews. I was supposed to hear back from the first company on the 13th with either an offer or a rejection. The night before I was a mess. I was going on and on and on to my hubby about the pros and cons of taking the job if they offered it to me. I was completely unsettled and had no idea whether I should accept it or not. I had a feeling I would be offered the job and just could not get a sense of what my answer should be. Josh was worried about me and so offered to give me a priesthood blessing (this is when a priesthood holder lays their hands on someone's head and gives them the blessings/information the Lord wants them to have relating to their current situation). I resisted at first. I told Josh that I didn't think God cared what job I had as long as I wasn't doing anything illegal or immoral. I don't know why I was so stuck on thinking that since I feel pretty strongly that jobs I have had in the past were essential for me to have, but perhaps I was a little afraid that God did care and that I wouldn't be able to figure out what He wanted me to do. After some more gentle prodding by my sweetie, I had him give me a blessing.
Now, I am not going to go into too much detail here about what I was told in the blessing. It doesn't seem appropriate. However, I will say that I felt much calmer after it was done and was assured that the Lord cared very much about this concern I was having. I also felt I needed to weigh my options out further before making a decision.
Last Tuesday, I was offered a job. The offer was for $5000 more a year than I am currently making, but insurance would have cost me $200 more a month than it currently does. My initial inclination was to accept, but I asked for some time to think it over. They sent me some paperwork and as I looked it over I started to have a bad feeling. Within a few short minutes I went from being almost sure I would take the job to knowing I would not take it. I felt that the bad feelings I was having were the answer to my prayer -- my answer should be no. So I turned down the job.
I went on two more interviews after that. Both went well, but I was really excited about the first. I liked the people and the feeling in the office. The company is much larger than the one I am currently with, therefore there are more opportunities for advancement. I really started hoping I would get the job. They told me they would be making their decision immediately after the holiday weekend and they would get back to me early this week. I expected to hear from them yesterday. I waited and I waited and I waited for a phone call, but none ever came. I started to feel depressed. Surely I would have heard from them if they wanted to hire me. "No news is good news," my friend assured me. I tried to believe her.
The hours rushed by today at work, but still every time I had a chance to catch my breath, I would wonder about this job, about why I hadn't heard from them. By mid-afternoon, I was feeling depressed again. I had to do something about it. I had to figure out what was going on. So I e-mailed the woman I interviewed with and asked if they had made a decision and if not when they were expecting to make one (this was unusually aggressive behavior on my part). She e-mailed me back and said they had not made a decision yet because of some internal issues but that she would get back to me by the end of the week. So I decided I would have to wait another day or two to find out my fate.
At 4:30 the phone rang. It was Josh with a message to call my interviewer at this company. He said he couldn't tell if she sounded happy or not. I called her and braced myself for the worst. She said:
"I would love for you to come work with us!"
The offer is for $6000 more a year than I am currently making. And the benefits are excellent -- better even than my current ones, which are really quite good.
For the past few years, I have just felt like I am not capable of knowing what the Lord wants me to do. I am not in tune, I cannot get inspiration.
But I did. I got inspiration. I knew that I shouldn't take that first job. Even though I didn't know what else was out there for me, I turned it down. And then something much better came along, something that I think will really make a difference for my family, something that will bring us a huge step closer to being on our own.
I am so grateful that He cares for me, that He cares for my family, that He knows our needs and our wants and helps us to achieve them, in His time, in His way. And I am grateful that my husband is a worthy priesthood holder. The blessing that I received under his hands made a big difference to me. And I am starting to feel once again that I am not such a bad person as to be unable to decipher God's communication. And that is a good feeling.
Monday, February 20, 2006
My Son, the Aspiring Songwriter
So lately the boy has this thing with making up songs. Yesterday on the way home from church he was singing, "After I die, I am going to heaven. I am not going to hell, that is where Satan lives." Currently, he is playing with legos and singing, "We're mommys from outer space. We're outer space mommys."
With lyrics like this, he's sure to have a hit record by the time he's ten, doncha think?
With lyrics like this, he's sure to have a hit record by the time he's ten, doncha think?
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
The Man I Love
On our first Valentine's Day, he didn't plan a thing. Not a thing. He picked me up from work and started out on the freeway and then proceeded to ask me what I wanted to do. We ended up window shopping at the mall and eating at Chili's. He didn't buy me any gifts. It was not exactly my dream date.
From that story, some people may think my husband isn't very romantic. And I could tell you all kinds of things about him that would convince you of it -- the man can be so juvenile sometimes and completely lack the ability to get serious.
But this is the most romantic man I have ever met.
He drew a picture of us for my wedding present.
I come home to find that he has bought me flowers or gifts -- just because.
He came to my office one day to have lunch with me and he was all dressed up in nice slacks, a button down shirt and a tie, he had actually shaved (!) and he had done his hair -- just to surprise me.
He gets up with our baby in the middle of the night so I can sleep.
When our son has the stomach flu, he cleans up the mess. One night, he stayed up all night watching our sick, sleeping little boy just to make sure he was okay.
Even though I am overweight and have tremendously ugly stretch marks, he treats me like I am the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. Sometimes I actually believe he believes it.
On top of all this, he married an insecure crazy woman who had been deeply scarred by her ex-husband and he has managed to convince her that loving her and being loved by her is the thing in his life which has brought him the greatest joy. He is raising a son who was born by another man and he is ten times the father that man will ever be. He loves our boy so deeply you can't tell that he missed out on being there from the beginning. And he is so gentle and sweet with our little girl. She is his angel.
He, however, is my angel. My life would be so empty without him. He is my valentine today, next year and forever.
Valentine's Day Articles
Check out these Valentine's Day related articles at National Review Online:
Cons in Love
Smart Sex
The Founders at Home
Cons in Love
Smart Sex
The Founders at Home
Sunday, February 12, 2006
The Truth
So, I am supposed to reveal which of my five statements is true. The sad thing is, the one I thought was true actually isn't and one that I thought wasn't true is. This knowledge came courtesy of my husband, who apparently knows me better than I know myself.
2) This is the one I thought was true, until my husband read it and reminded me that I had actually beaten him at slug bug many times and also once at Clue. Also, I just beat him at a game at our ward activity last night. However, he usually does win any game we play against each other, which does greatly annoy me and injure my pride.
3) I have no desire to go on Survivor. Getting up off the couch to change the channel when the remote has been misplaced is about as much as I push myself physically. I wish someone would give me a million dollars for that.
4) I have many things, but sadly, confidence is not one of them.
5) I think I would drive 50 miles to get a better view of a meteor shower, but I have actually never done that. I do love meteor showers, however.
So the truth, it turns out is number 1. I didn't realize that I knew all the ships involved in the first Death Star battle until my husband asked me to do my best to name them all (he knew the answer, but he knows more about Star Wars than George Lucas does, I think) and I listed all four ships correctly -- X-wing, Y-wing, Tie Fighter and the Millenium Falcon. I am a bigger nerd than I thought I was.
2) This is the one I thought was true, until my husband read it and reminded me that I had actually beaten him at slug bug many times and also once at Clue. Also, I just beat him at a game at our ward activity last night. However, he usually does win any game we play against each other, which does greatly annoy me and injure my pride.
3) I have no desire to go on Survivor. Getting up off the couch to change the channel when the remote has been misplaced is about as much as I push myself physically. I wish someone would give me a million dollars for that.
4) I have many things, but sadly, confidence is not one of them.
5) I think I would drive 50 miles to get a better view of a meteor shower, but I have actually never done that. I do love meteor showers, however.
So the truth, it turns out is number 1. I didn't realize that I knew all the ships involved in the first Death Star battle until my husband asked me to do my best to name them all (he knew the answer, but he knows more about Star Wars than George Lucas does, I think) and I listed all four ships correctly -- X-wing, Y-wing, Tie Fighter and the Millenium Falcon. I am a bigger nerd than I thought I was.
Friday, February 10, 2006
Can You Handle the Truth?
One of the coolest of all the cool bloggers made my day by calling me one of her new blogging friends, so I must respond to her request that I participate in the following meme. If any of my five readers wish to also participate, please do! There's some tagging thing you're supposed to do with these but I am a babe in the blogging woods and these technical things, they confuse me. So leave me a note in my comments if you have completed the meme and I will visit your groovy site so I can use my powers of discernment to identify your one truth. Instuctions for the meme are below.
Meme Directions:Write five things about yourself with only ONE of them being true. The other four are fiction, and everyone else gets to guess which one is not fiction.
1. I can name all the different kinds of ships that were involved in the first Death Star battle in Star Wars.
2. I have never beaten my husband in any game we have played together. For this, he must die.
3. My dream is to go on Survivor. I love to eat bugs, go without showering, undermine my competition and wear very little clothing. Winning the million dollars would just be a bonus.
4. I have confidence in sunshine. I have confidence in rain. I have confidence that spring will come again. Besides which you see I have confidence in me.
5. I once drove 50 miles just to get a better view of a meteor shower.
Okay, tell me what you think. I'll let you know in . . . 48 hours, I guess.
Meme Directions:Write five things about yourself with only ONE of them being true. The other four are fiction, and everyone else gets to guess which one is not fiction.
1. I can name all the different kinds of ships that were involved in the first Death Star battle in Star Wars.
2. I have never beaten my husband in any game we have played together. For this, he must die.
3. My dream is to go on Survivor. I love to eat bugs, go without showering, undermine my competition and wear very little clothing. Winning the million dollars would just be a bonus.
4. I have confidence in sunshine. I have confidence in rain. I have confidence that spring will come again. Besides which you see I have confidence in me.
5. I once drove 50 miles just to get a better view of a meteor shower.
Okay, tell me what you think. I'll let you know in . . . 48 hours, I guess.
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